Sharing the case of a Class V child who had been branded as 'aggressive' and 'violent' by teachers,Parents and children of his group.For more than two months ,this ten years old boy had been going through phases of unpredictable behaviour.He would react at the slightest provocation,hit his peers,would be distracted in the Class and his attention span would keep varying.
The Class teacher tried to be firm with him,tried to reason with him and and also explained the consequences.There were other children in the group she needed to pay attention to and was not being able to give adequate time to this boy.In a few subject classes,he was made to sit in the centre and deprived from exploring the activity till the time he changed his behaviour. Scolded by teachers,labelled by children and complaints from the other Parents......all this was leading to further confusion and dilemma.The child was losing confidence,withdrawing in his own shell and in turn reacting by hitting and pushing the other children.
Finally the case was brought up for discussion and suggestions.I felt it was important to find out the reasons behind this kind of behaviour.What was most important was to be non judgmental .First and foremost,a meeting was fixed with all the teachers handling this Class and understand their concerns.A meeting was fixed with the Parents to understand if a similar behaviour was also being reflected at home.Both the Parents working,there was not enough time that they could spend with the child.He had shared with his Parents his reluctance to go to school and also that he was not loved and liked by his friends and teachers.All this was a result of the teachers and Parents not relating to his emotional needs.
To begin with,the child had to be involved in the activities in the Class, giving certain responsibilities would help him in becoming confident and initiating a sense of self worth.Individual interactions,love and affection,openly appreciating him for his positive qualities and avoiding to pass general statements in the group related to his behaviour would help him.A consistency in the strategies at home was required.Children in the Class had to be sensitively oriented to accept him .
The little boy was also firmly told that he could not hit or push his peers in the group.If he was upset or angry,he needed to verbally express his thoughts and feelings.The Class teacher was constantly in touch with the Parents.
Two weeks later,there has been a remarkable change in the child's behaviour.He is more confident,happier,settled and participative in the Class activities.He is more focused and the aggression in his behaviour is no longer visible.Children are never violent or aggressive,its the behaviour,looking for reasons and finding solutions sensitively always helps.
